Relationship conflict
A relationship conflict (s: Relationship conflict ) is a process of dealing, which is based on different interests of individuals and social groups and is institutionalized in different ways and is discharged.
The psychologist and theologian Karl Berkel defined the relationship conflict as follows:
"Relationship conflicts arise when one party hurts, humiliates, disregards the other."
The delimitation principle
Overall, there are two types of demarcation, which differ as follows: Boundaries are important in a system and thus also in a two-way relationship. On the one hand, the partners distinguish themselves from each other within the couple relationship ( inner boundary ). On the other hand, the couple distinguishes themselves from other people ( external border ). Such borders are characterized by the fact that they can be clear and permeable ( healthy delimitation ), rigid ( lack of flexibility ) or diffuse ( unclear ).
A healthy relationship is thus characterized by a clear outer border. There is something typical about this couple's relationship with one another that sets them apart from others. This two-way relationship can be recognized as such from the outside. The partners feel like a couple and create space and time together. At the same time, the partners must be clearly distinguished from one another within the couple relationship and also lead an individual life that they respect each other.
example
Example of a relationship conflict:
- Party I appeals to Party II (“do it”, “do it”, “get it” etc.). Party II does not react or answers succinctly: "Yes, same"; A conflict arises between Party I and Party II.
Conflict behavior in relationships - The five apocalyptic horsemen
In partnerships, conflicts can be resolved in different ways. Bas Kast names five so-called "apocalyptic horsemen" who can endanger relationships. These are criticism, defense, contempt, retreat and show of force.
The first apocalyptic horseman, criticism, is characterized by the fact that not only the plot but also the person is attacked.
The second apocalyptic horseman defense is about justification, which leads to the fact that the partner does not feel taken seriously.
The most dangerous is the contempt that manifests itself through cynicism or sarcasm and is reinforced by negative thoughts.
The apocalyptic horseman retreat is mostly chosen by men who often wall in relationships. This creates a feeling of powerlessness. Neither anger nor disdain is nor felt.
Show of force is the fifth horseman of the apocalyptic. It is dangerous, because the partner no longer takes the other person into consideration. Instead of compromising, the relationship partners do what they want.
literature
Bas Kast: Love and how passion is explained, S. Fisher Verlag, Frankfurt am Main 2006.
Individual evidence
- ↑ Multimedia program communication, conflict types
- ↑ Bas Kast: Love and how passion is explained . S. 133 f . the following .