User talk:BentAlBatoul

Aye

Eh, life, you know the things it throws at you. And is there something wrong with being a female? Just kidding. --Enzuru 14:32, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

And love bug (my talk page is the only place besides your user page that you edited), you didn't have to ask. --Enzuru 14:42, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

There are alot of things wrong with being female, so i take it you are? -what things? (BentAlBatoul (talk) 17:43, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

"It killed something within me, when I thought I could pretend to be a gardener and still secretly see you, and then after you left me, I realized actions spoke louder than words, and if I was ever to talk to you again as who I was I would not be loved, but judged in the same narrow way I was judged when you were with me, that led me to tears and self-hatred." It's fitting. --Enzuru 18:11, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

but why depressed NOW...you evidently weren't a while ago... (BentAlBatoul (talk) 18:14, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

You're misunderstanding me, but that's okay. It's not something you need to worry about, okies? It's sweet you worried, but it's painful too. --Enzuru 18:25, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

Please explain yourself to me. I won't leave you alone. Go. (BentAlBatoul (talk) 18:28, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

Sheesh, shouldn't you be at school woman? --Enzuru 18:30, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

Thanksgiving. Stop changing the topic. and you DONT know me stop implying you do! (BentAlBatoul (talk) 18:34, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

Sentence fragments and yelling at the end of points. HMM. Anyway, go give thanks for something! --Enzuru 18:36, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

Mr. Enzuru, who is friends to a transexual lesbian alevi who is like anti hijab and would be my biggest enemy if i cared to associate with her/him (who knows), tell me whats going on in your life and why you are depressed please.

I also became super close with all my Shi'a Iranian religious friends like you wanted (not the Arab ones, eick), hang out a bunch with MSA (but won't join haha) and went to Hezbullahi's wedding (it was funny, some guy tried to get me married there, and Hezbullahi was like your duas have been granted!). Now, good miss, months ago, you closed our lives from each other. It's not that I hate you, but, situations are different now. I took a year to open up to you in the first place, things aren't the same. Tears are coming now (I'm in public), but I don't console in you anymore. I can't. Life moves on but our hearts don't.

After the last event, death threats and all (I wasn't afraid of that, I didn't want you to get scared, but most importantly I wanted to leave your family alone and stop harassing them and I needed to move on), I took time and thought. I then wrote a letter to Imam al-Mahdi (AS) for the first time in my life, asking for my sweetness to be returned to me, and buried the letter. The next day, my heart was given what I needed to do. Okay? Move on, and stay gorgeous. --Enzuru 18:52, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

"Life moves on but our hearts don't" (BentAlBatoul (talk) 18:57, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

We are surrounded by life, we make the decisions of our lives, no one forces us. Pain is always there, all our hearts can do is sing. --Enzuru 18:59, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

singing is haram dumbo (BentAlBatoul (talk) 19:03, 13 October 2008 (UTC))

Take care, silly.

And khuda hafiz! --Enzuru 19:04, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

no..why are you going?

Sweetheart, did you bother to read the next line? The hadith from Bihar al-Anwar. I'm going to get through everything, okay? Let me tell you something. The depression I had with you, before you, that depression is gone, Mishima is still cool but my life doesn't have to end like that. My life doesn't have to end like Isa's. I have purpose now, meaning, I am finding my light, but I'm in the hardest part of my life because I have to resolve everything to understand my happiness. Have faith in Him. This will be my final message to you, I won't respond after this. --Enzuru 19:12, 13 October 2008 (UTC)

I guess it is better for you if you don't respond, and i'm glad you feel you have a purpose. I don't. I moved forward, put things behind me, forgot. And then all of this fakeness built crumbles again, and i'm back just where i started. Raw, alone, hurting. I had to swear on the quran i would never speak, ask about, contact or think about you again. And i did, and i failed. So i'll be deleting this conversation soon. I don't know if you have been watching desperate housewives still, i have, alone. Funny Susan and Mike are divorced after all that, lol. Anyhow, Khuda hafiz to you too. And for the record, you still are the light of my heart.