Bridal show in Turkey
The bride show in Turkey is a traditional process of establishing a partnership within the framework of an arranged marriage . This tradition is still widespread, especially in rural areas and in the Islamic conservative milieu, due to the gender segregation .
background
The education-related median age for marriage in Turkey in the late 1980s and early 1990s was 17.2 years in rural areas and 17.8 years in urban areas. For 2017, men were given 27.7 years and women 24.6 years. Social pressure also often plays a role in initiating marriage. It also happens that courtship is staged pro forma even though the couple has already decided to marry. The legal marriageable age in Turkey is 18 years. The proportion of kinship marriages in Turkey varies from region to region and was 23 percent nationwide in 1983 and 22 percent nationwide in 2006.
Stages of courtship
Traditional courtship starts with the family of the potential groom and has different phases.
Görücülük
Görücülük describes the first phase of the traditional bridal show in Anatolia for an arranged marriage. "Görmek" means "see". Görücü denotes a person who conducts the bride show. Görücülük is the act of showing the bride. Relatives and family members of the man look out for a suitable partner. As soon as a potential partner is found, visits are made to the girl's family. Possible visitors usually include the man's mother, his sisters and trustworthy neighbors. From the behavior of the girl it can be read whether the wish meets with acceptance. Classic selection criteria are Namus (sexual virginity), character, modesty, diligence, skill and appearance. But economic considerations, education and origin also play a role. Marriage between families in a similar economic situation is preferred. The woman's will is not decisive; the other family members must also agree. According to a study by the Konda research institute in 2016, half of all marriages concluded in Turkey take place using Görücülük.
Dünürcülük
The second phase is called "Dünürcülük". In Turkish, "Dünür" describes the relationship between the parents of the bride and groom. A formal visit to the girl's family is carried out at Dünürcülük. On the man's side, those persons in the household whose word counts take part. The traditional formula for the proposal is: “Allah'ın emri, Peygamberin kavliyle kızınızı oĝlumuza istiyoruz.” That means: “By command of God and with the word of the prophet we want your daughter for our son.” The answer from the father of the woman is : "Kismetse olur." ("If fate wants it, so be it.") Or "Allah yazdıysa biz ne diyelim" ("If God wrote it like this, what should we say").
Söz kesme
“Söz kesme” (“marriage promise”) describes the binding agreements on başlık and gifts between both families and thus a kind of pre-engagement. If there is agreement on all points, the official engagement ("nişan") follows later, which is usually celebrated with a ceremony. In certain regions, the agreement was sealed with a drink called "söz şerbeti" ("promise sorbet").
kidnapping
If the families do not agree or if the woman's family refuses, the girl may be “kidnapped” (“kız kaçırma”) with or without the woman's consent in order to force the marriage. The background to this are cultural ideas that significantly impair the marriage prospects of a woman who has once been kidnapped. Serious disagreements are to be feared in both cases. In the case of kidnappings of girls who have not yet reached the age of 15, the tStGB provides for long prison sentences for deprivation of liberty and (in the case of sexual contact) for child abuse. According to a 2016 study, 10 percent of arranged marriages occurred without exploring the will of anyone involved.
Individual evidence
- ^ A b Heidrun Czock Social Studies in Turkey: Economy, Profession, Education, Religion, Family, Upbringing, Opladen 1991, p. 137
- ↑ Türkiye'de evlenme yaşı yükseliyor
- ↑ Türkiye'nin yüzde 22'si akraba evliliği yapıyor
- ↑ dergipark.gov.tr
- ↑ a b Konda barometer on the subjects of marriage, age at marriage and sexual exploitation , Turkish
literature
- İbrahim Sarı: Türklerde Evlenme Gelenekleri. Antalya 2017