Meta-mirror

The meta-mirror , often also called metamirror, is a technique for solving difficult, interpersonal communication disorders that is used in NLP . Meta comes from the Greek (μετα) and means, among other things, something like "behind, over". While “mirror” is derived from the Latin speculum “image, mirroring” and the Latin specere “see”.

history

Robert Dilts developed the meta-mirror in 1988 and first described it in his book The Change of Belief Systems. The term meta-mirror was chosen because it was assumed that the behavior of a person when communicating with another person is only a reflection of his own internal communication. Another explanation for the term meta-mirror can be derived from the fact that in the course of the technology a person with communication difficulties is asked to take a so-called metaposition in order to view the communication from the outside in a dissociated manner.

application

The meta-mirror is used in coaching and can be used when a client (person A) has communication difficulties with another person (person B) . Communication problems in the private sector, e.g. B. be in the family or in the professional environment. During coaching, person B is often not present and only the coach and the client (person A) take part in the session. When using the meta-mirror, the coach asks the client (person A) to adopt different perceptual positions in order to look at the communication problem from different perspectives. The perspective taken consciously or unconsciously from which a situation is experienced is called the perceptual position. If the client has communication difficulties with the other person B , the perspective is often restricted to the very own situation and perception. The client sees himself as a victim and sometimes feels attacked by the other person. There is no solution in sight for the client. Going through the various perceptual positions dissolves the restricted perspective and opens up new ways of looking at communication. The technology is suitable for self-reflection on one's own communication.

technology

Perceptual positions

Perceptual positions

Four different perceptual positions are used in the course of the technique.

1st position - self

In this position, the client establishes communication with the other person B before. Either he imagines a past situation or a situation how it could be in the future when he meets the other person again. The client is associated, that is, he is completely in the situation and feels his emotions and experiences the imagined communication as if it actually took place at this moment from his point of view.

2nd position - the other person

In the second position the client imagines as if he were person B , ie he experiences the situation from the perspective of the other person. He is dissociated from his own world of experience and experiences the other person's emotional world in association.

3. Position - meta-position or observer

There are two different definitions:

1. Robert Dilts defined the third position as a position that is outside the relationship between the client and the other person. The third position experiences the communication between the client and person B in association, ie the third position perceives the assumptions, beliefs and emotions of both persons and can thus see them in relation to one another and at the same time.
2. Another definition is the outsider, uninvolved observer of the situation. Contrary to Robert Dilts' definition, the third position experiences the situation as dissociated and has no access to the emotional world of the client and the other person. The third position analyzes the situation impartially.

4th position - meta-mirror

Robert Dilts referred to the fourth position as the meta-mirror. Sometimes other terms such as meta-four or advisor to the observer are used. Depending on the definition of the third position used, the fourth position can be seen as a double dissociation. The fourth position is used to explore the relationship pattern between the first and third position. The way the third person deals with the first.

Format of technology

The four different positions are marked on the ground ( ground anchors ), e.g. B. through moderation cards. The coach asks the client to adopt these perceptual positions during the course of the technique. The format of the meta mirror consists of the following steps:

1. Name problem partner - The client names the person with whom he has difficult communication problems and determines the positions in the room that represent the individual perceptual positions.
2. Identify the other person's behavior - The client takes the first position and describes the other person's behavior that makes communication difficult.
3. Name your own behavior - The client now moves to the third position, the meta-position, and describes his own behavior, whereby he is dissociated from himself.
4. Systemic dependencies - the client remains in the meta position and tries to discuss to what extent his own behavior is related to the behavior of the other person, triggers or reinforces it.
5. New Behaviors - Remaining in the meta position, the client thinks about other ways of communicating with the other person.
6. Own behavior towards oneself - The client changes to the fourth position and looks at the interaction between the third and the first position. The client recognizes here how he, dissociated from himself, sees and treats himself. In this position it can be seen that the reaction from the third position to the client himself (first position) is a reflection of how the other person behaves towards the client.
7. Change of position - The client remains in the fourth position and checks what it is like if he directs his reaction to himself, now from the first position to the other person, and what it is like to react from the first position to the other person Meta position directed towards yourself.
8. Self-perception - The coach asks the client to move to the second position and to perceive his behavior there from the perspective of the other person.
9. Re-association - The client now goes back to the first position and describes how his reactions and perceptions have changed.
10. Continuation - The positions are changed until the client has the feeling that the communication is more balanced or until the coach determines a reconciliation physiology.

literature

• Robert B. Dilts: The Change in Belief Systems. Junfermann Verlag, Paderborn 1993, ISBN 3-8738-7068-1 .
• Alexa Mohl: The master student. The Sorcerer's Apprentice II , Junfermann Verlag, Paderborn 1996, ISBN 3-8738-7306-0 .

Individual evidence

1. ↑ American edition: Changing Belief Systems with NLP. Meta Publications 1990.

This article is about a health issue. It is not used for self-diagnosis and does not replace a diagnosis by a doctor. Please note the information on health issues !