Desire for children

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The desire for children is the desire (or need) of people to have children. Today, the term is often incorrectly used synonymously to denote an unfulfilled desire for children ( infertility ).

History and sociology

The desire to have children in its current form is discussed in the psychological literature as a modern phenomenon , since it was only since the possibility of effective contraception that a separation of sexuality and motherhood or fatherhood became possible. Only the freedom to choose between parenthood and intentional childlessness within the framework of life planning made the possibility of a wish possible .

Differences between men and women

According to a study by the Federal Institute for Population Research, men and women would like different numbers of children (see table). Surprising was u. a. the finding that 33% of men want more than 3 children, but only 26% of all women. 10% of women do not want children at all, but only 5% of men. 2–4% of all respondents wanted children without being able to give a specific number (“?” In the table).

Desired number of children Men Women
0 (none at all) 5% 10%
1 5% 5%
2 37% 40%
3 11% 11%
> 3 (more than 3) 33% 26%
? (unsure) 2% 4%

Motifs

There are many reasons for wanting children. Some authors argue that a person's desire to have children is neither biological nor instinctive . A desire to have children can be self, partner or couple related, normative or socially determined. Examples of self-related motives are, from a psychological point of view, an expanded body experience , the view as a life's task, overcoming loneliness, or even reviving one's own childhood . A desired stabilization of the partnership or the removal of deficits in a relationship are considered couple-related motives. The view that children belong to a family is a normatively shaped motive, the wish of one's own parents for grandchildren a social one.
The desire to have children is inherently ambivalent , since in addition to the desire to have a child, there are also fears about changes in the personal life situation, burdens and limitations.
If this ambivalence is missing, one also speaks of an excessive desire for children . The wish for a child becomes life-determining and affected couples are ready to subordinate many other areas to the fulfillment of the wish.

Unfulfilled desire to have children

Of infertility is when it is not over a longer period to enter a pregnancy is that even with a birth ends.

As part of preconception counseling , women who are planning to have a child soon are recommended, among other things, to eat healthily before they become pregnant, possibly to carry out folic acid and vitamin D prophylaxis and to rule out iron deficiency . The vaccination status is also important, with any post- vaccinations ( e.g. against measles , mumps , rubella , varicella and pneumococci ) being carried out before pregnancy . Further examinations, such as genetic counseling, are also considered.

literature

  • Flora Albarelli, Simone Widhalm: Eiertanz, the fertility book , mvg, Munich 2010, ISBN 978-3-86882-206-9 .
  • Jessica Groß: Desire for children and sterility: to motivate the desire to have children in sterility patients (= research psychosocial ). Psychosozialverlag, Gießen 1999, ISBN 3-932133-71-4 (Dissertation Humboldt University Berlin 1999, 387 pages, 21 cm).
  • Millay Hyatt: Unsatisfied longing: when we are worried about having children. Ch. Links, Berlin 2012, ISBN 978-3-86153-665-9 .
  • Regina Könnecke: Coping Patterns Unintentionally Childless Men , VAS, Frankfurt am Main 2000, ISBN 3-88864-294-9 (Dissertation University of Heidelberg 1999, 185 pages, 21 cm).

Web links

See also

Individual evidence

  1. ↑ a b Jessica Groß: Desire for children and sterility. To motivate sterility patients to have children. Psychosozial-Verlag, Giessen 1999, ISBN 3-932133-71-4 , p. 338.
  2. ↑ C. Maier-Kirstätter, S. Ditz: Psychosomatic aspects in diagnosis and therapy of sterility. In: Gynecological Endocrinology and Reproductive Medicine. Springer 1994, ISBN 978-3-662-07634-7 , pp. 189-207.
  3. ↑ Tutt, C. (2016) Female academics want children more often than other women , Wirtschaftswoche May 30, 2016 (archive) .
  4. ↑ C. Maier-Kirstätter, S. Ditz: Psychosomatic aspects in diagnosis and therapy of sterility. In: Gynäkologische Endokrinologie und Fortpflanzungsmedizin, Springer 1994, ISBN 978-3-662-07634-7 , pp. 189-207
  5. ↑ Heike Stammer, Rolf Verres, Tewes Wischmann: Couples counseling and therapy for unfulfilled desire to have children. Hogrefe Verlag, 2004, ISBN 3840914582 , p. 18.
  6. ↑ Bianka Echtermeyer: Why do women really want to get pregnant? The sex psychologist and couples therapist Christoph J. Ahlers advises women and couples who have an unfulfilled desire to have children. Brigitte Mom dated: August 25, 2018.
  7. ↑ Viola Frick-Bruder: Care of the infertile couple, including psychosomatic and psychodynamic aspects. In: C. Schirren , F. Leidenberger, V. Frick-Bruder, GE Hirsch, K. Rudolf, B. Schütte: Unfulfilled desire for children. Deutscher Ärzteverlag, Cologne 1995, ISBN 3-7691-0299-1 , pp. 233-244
  8. ↑ J. Kowalcek, M. Stauber: marriage infertility and reproductive medicine: Psychosomatic aspects. In: Klaus Diedrich (Hrsg.): Female sterility: causes, diagnosis and therapy. Springer, 1998, ISBN 3642587380 , pp. 282-293.
  9. ↑ Volker Briese: Nutritional advice in pregnancy , Walter de Gruyter, 2010, ISBN 978-3-11-024620-9 . P. 5 .