Wilfried Wieck
Wilfried Wieck (born May 28, 1938 in Berlin-Steglitz ; † June 9, 2000 ) was a German psychologist and writer.
Life
After studying mathematics and physics in 1971, doctorate in business administration . After marrying Almuth Wieck in 1964, worked for a number of years in children's shop initiatives. 1966 birth of daughter Katja Irina Wieck. Contact with Josef Rattner gave me the motivation to study psychology at the Free University of Berlin . 1981 doctorate together with his partner Irmgard Hülsemann on the subject of "super-ego conflicts as a therapeutic problem". After working for many years in the working group for depth psychology , group therapy and group dynamics , from 1980 worked in his own psychological practice with Irmgard Hülsemann in Charlottenburg. The concept of his work is rooted in depth psychology, humanistic psychology and increasingly including feminist perspectives on the problems of women and men. In 1982 Wieck began his work as a lecturer at the Lessing University in Berlin , which he held until his death.
Reading and lecture tours took Wieck through Germany, Switzerland and Austria and made him known to a wide audience. He accepted numerous invitations to talk shows, including Drei nach Neun, Mona Lisa, night club, Ziischtig Club, Zeil um Zehn, Berliner Salon, Friday night - Berlin talk show, night café . In 1989 Wieck and Irmgard Hülsemann took part in the Goldegger dialogues on the subject of "fear of life - living fears".
Wilfried Wieck lived in Berlin until his death.
Men's work critical of patriarchy and "men let love"
In 1983 Wieck began to develop men's work that was critical of patriarchy . He has published numerous books on this subject. " Men let love " was translated into several languages, including Polish, Italian, Dutch, Japanese and Finnish. One of the core theses of the book is that in patriarchy men delegate important emotional relationship and emotional work to women. As a result, they would withdraw from their own human development or even actively refuse it, which often enormously restricts their ability to bond, relate and love. At the same time, through this attitude, they missed dealing with deficits and injuries from childhood. Traditional upbringing means that femininity is defined by closeness and the ability to bond, while men experience themselves as masculine through distance and the ability to separate. Because women are prepared to compensate for these emotional deficits, this leads not only to the erroneous assumption that men are less needy than women, but also to the devaluation of female skills and values. This is where numerous conflicts in couple relationships are rooted in the need for closeness and distance, dependency and independence. In conflict situations, men often resorted to the violence they experienced in their own childhood or fell into silence, a strategy of emotional withdrawal to leave the existing problems unresolved. The solution is left to the women, who turn to the men again and again and take on the laborious emotional work for them. The direct transfer of these role models to children is particularly fatal, for whom the father seems too distant and absent, and for whom the mother seems too close and overprotective. It is this often accepted role of the mother, who comforts the child on behalf of the father or tries to explain or excuse the father's outbursts, which in Wieck's eyes also makes women perpetrators. By constantly relieving the man of his own emotional work or by accepting his violent behavior, she is secretly making a pact with the patriarch and supporting this system in a different but equally effective way as the men. The woman becomes a co-perpetrator through her self-denying attitude. The patriarchal arrangement of the sexes becomes a source of frustration and violence, which leads to suffering and destruction both in private relationships and within social structures. Change is only possible if numerous men and women are ready to question their traditionally acquired role models, to abandon social constraints, to try new things and to be interested in comprehensive growth processes together.
Works
- with Irmgard Hülsemann: Super-ego conflicts as a therapeutic problem. (Solution approaches in the group). Dissertation , Free University of Berlin, 1981.
- with Irmgard Hülsemann: The secret prohibitions. Moral Conflicts in Therapy. Kreuz-Verlag, 1989, ISBN 3-7831-0988-4 .
- Men let love. Kreuz-Verlag, 1989, ISBN 3-7831-0880-2 .
- Fears of life - live fears. 8. Goldegger Dialoge - conference proceedings with contributions by Eugen Drewermann , Irmgard Hülsemann, Verena Kast, Wolfgang Wesiack, Wilfried Wieck and others. v. a. Publishing house Kulturverein Schloss Goldegg, 1989.
- Sons want fathers. Against the feminine grip. Hoffmann and Campe, 1992, ISBN 3-455-08463-X .
- When men learn to love. Fischer-Tb, 1993, ISBN 3-596-11095-5 .
- Sender: Your son. Letters to the father. DTV, 1995, ISBN 3-423-30466-9 .
- My daughter and I. A father wants to grow up. Fischer-Tb, 1996, ISBN 3-596-13160-X .
- What men only say to men. Kreuz-Verlag, 1999, ISBN 3-7831-1708-9 .
- Dear mother, you are not doing me any good. Kreuz-Verlag, 2000, ISBN 3-268-00254-4 .
- The man's eroticism. Between longing and paralysis. Vedo-Verlag, 2002, ISBN 3-7831-2116-7 . (Edited from the estate and available manuscripts by Irmgard Hülsemann)
Web links
- Confession to weakness. In: Der Spiegel. No. 36, September 3, 1990.
- Recording of an episode of Nachtcafè (1991) , moderated by Wieland Backes and with Wilfried Wieck, Erwin Teufel , Gisela Uhlen, among others
See also
| personal data | |
|---|---|
| SURNAME | Wieck, Wilfried |
| BRIEF DESCRIPTION | German psychologist and writer |
| DATE OF BIRTH | May 28, 1938 |
| PLACE OF BIRTH | Berlin-Steglitz |
| DATE OF DEATH | June 9, 2000 |
| Place of death | Berlin |