Wikipedia:Version 1.0 Editorial Team/Nordic cinema articles by quality/2

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
Directed by	Mike Bigelow
Written by	Harris Goldberg Rob Schneider David Garrett Jason Ward
Produced by	John Schneider
Starring	Rob Schneider Eddie Griffin Jeroen Krabbé Til Schweiger Adam Sandler
Distributed by	Columbia Pictures
Release dates	August 12, 2005
Running time	83 minutes
Language	English
Budget	US$22,000,000 (estimated)
Box office	US$22,264,487

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005) is the sequel to the 1999 film Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo.

Premise

Rob Schneider stars as Deuce Bigalow, a male prostitute who must go to Europe to help his pimp T.J., played by Eddie Griffin, find a murderer who is killing the greatest male prostitutes of Europe. Film critic Roger Ebert includes the movie in his most hated films list.

Plot

Gigolos in Europe are being terrorized by a serial killer. In Malibu, self-styled fish-expert Deuce Bigalow's wife is dead from a shark attack. Deuce, who briefly worked as a gigolo, is called up by T.J. Hicks, his former pimp, who invites him to come to Amsterdam where T.J. is pimping. Deuce goes because he is suspected of complicity in some dolphin-related injuries in Malibu.

When he gets to Amsterdam, Deuce tries to break the ice by wearing an American flag styled t-shirt, but this just makes every passer-by curse him. Only a middle-aged woman cheers the US for helping bring democracy to Iraq, but another passer-by immediately knocks her over by throwing a baguette at her. Deuce then tricks a female window washer into bumping harder into the window with her wet white t-shirt. Deuce also wonders if the scantily-clad prostitutes behind the windows in the red-light district realize that their curtains are open.

T.J. finally meets Deuce and shows him his boat, or "float crib," which has water in the cabin. They go to a coffee shop where T.J. tricks Deuce into getting high on space cake. There, Deuce looks at a painting on the wall, and has an audio-visual hallucination of a maiden who tells him her turn-ons, which just happen to be his traits (weak, unemployed, always browsing for free porn, etc.). Also at the coffee shop, T.J. and Deuce run into Heinz Hummer, the "gigolo with the most below."

After leaving the coffee shop, Deuce finds Hummer dead in an alley, but thinks he is just "wasted." Deuce takes the dead gigolo to T.J.'s float crib, where they watch a local topless weather lady on the television, until T.J. gets back and immediately realizes Hummer is dead. T.J. is seen dumping the body with Hummer's zipper open (after an attempt to confirm rumors that Heinz is extremely well-endowed), and is subsequently portrayed in the media as a gay gigolo killer. At least, T.J. escapes. Deuce, on the other hand, is apprehended and taken to the police station where he is interviewed by Gaspar, a police inspector who wants to know where T.J. is hiding.

Upon his release from the police station, Deuce finds T.J. at a chicken 'n' waffles restaurant, where T.J. claims Deuce is racist for figuring out that he would be at "the only chicken 'n' waffles place in all of Holland." After they leave the restaurant, Deuce recalls that he saw the real killer walking away from Hummer's body. Deuce says it was a woman, so they both figure it was a she-john, a former client of the murdered gigolo.

T.J. convinces Deuce to help find the real killer by becoming a gigolo again, visiting the former clients and rooting out the killer. They attend a meeting of the Royal Order Of European Man Whores (an organization of male prostitutes), but fail to procure a list of the clients. Afterwards, they get the list from Antoine, the professional gigolo who appeared in Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo.

Deuce and T.J. visit the first client on the list. Deuce is intimated by this Amazon of a woman, who wants to breast feed him after making him wear a diaper and be treated like a baby. Meanwhile, T.J. breaks into her residence and searches for evidence. T.J. finds a brand of lipstick which might be the kind found on all the victims. After leaving, Deuce finds Gaspar on the street and shows him the lipstick. Gaspar throws the lipstick in the trash, saying that the lipstick found on the victims "is a very rare one: Lavender Love #66."

As Gaspar enters the police station, his niece, Eva, approaches him and gives him his lunch. Gaspar sneezes on his way inside, and Eva slaps herself three times. Deuce helps her pick up the things she dropped, and Eva explains to Deuce that she has obsessive-compulsive disorder. Fish-enthusiast Deuce sees that she has a painting of a fish, so they go to the Amsterdam aquarium together.

At the aquarium, Deuce has an argument with a cigarette-smoking Frenchman who repeatedly insults Deuce while mocking Americans and making advances on Eva. Deuce eventually puts the uppity Frenchman in his place. Deuce and Eva leave the park because Eva has to get to work. To his horror, Deuce discovers that Eva works in the pornographic film industry. He has heard women moaning inside the building where she works, and he sees a line of partially clad men and a donkey waiting outside. Deuce rushes inside and throws one of the male performers - a midget - out of a window, only to find out that Eva is merely a scenic artist, and not a performer.

Deuce continues to investigate different women from Antoine's book. The clients include a woman named Svetlana who was born near Chernobyl and has a very active penis for a nose, a hunchbacked woman, a woman with a tracheotomy, and a woman with gigantic ears. As is typical of Deuce, he tries various methods of helping these women feel more comfortable about their disfigurements. He has the hunchbacked woman wear a cut-open backpack which hides her hump, gets the woman with a tracheotomy a job as an airport announcer, and takes the penis-nosed woman and the woman with the huge ears to a plastic surgery clinic. However, both come out with the same disfigurements, having opted for breast enhancement surgery instead.

While visiting Eva, Deuce is snooping around and finds clothing similar to what was worn by the killer he saw on the night Hummer died. Deuce also finds Lavender Love #66 lipstick. Deuce rushes to the police department and tells Gaspar that he thinks Eva is the man-whore killer. Gaspar is reluctant to believe this, and even drops many hints that he himself is the man-whore killer, but Deuce remains clueless.

Gaspar goes home to see Eva, who has uncovered the fact that her uncle is indeed the man-whore killer. He leaves Eva inside his room, knowing that she cannot use doorknobs because of her compulsive disorder. Deuce rides with Gaspar to the Man-Whore Awards Ceremony under the guise of protecting the male prostitutes there. However, to Gaspar's surprise, Eva is chasing them on a motorbike, and shouting at Deuce that Gaspar is the killer. Gaspar pulls a gun on Deuce and proceeds to tell him that, once, Gaspar was a man-whore hopeful. While Gaspar was observing a demonstration on how to perform a certain sex act, one of his classmates offered to let him use his penis-enlargement pump. When the demonstration ended, Gaspar was horrified to learn that the woman who was on the receiving end of the sex act was his fiancée. Gaspar became so angry that he continued to pump until his penis exploded. He blames man-whores for the loss of his fiancée and his penis, and plans to blow them all up at their awards ceremony.

At the ceremony, Deuce only manages to evacuate the building by saying that he himself is the man-whore killer and that he has a bomb. Deuce and Gaspar then have a sword fight with penis-shaped swords. To the horror of the man-whores, Deuce tries to convince Gaspar being a man-whore is just a ploy for money, and that what women really want is not a man who knows every sex move in the book, but a man who just cares for how they feel (or at least pretends to). Gaspar ultimately beats Deuce, but before he can activate the bomb via a remote control, the woman with a penis for a nose quickly feeds a drink to the woman with a tracheotomy, whose neck hole sprays the liquid at Gaspar and temporarily blinds him. Deuce then picks up one of the scattered award trophies littering the floor and clobbers Gaspar in the back of the head, knocking him out cold and taking the bomb detonator from him. The woman with a penis for a nose then accidentally falls over, nose first, into the neck hole of the woman with a tracheotomy.

For his bravery, Deuce is given the Golden Boner award - an explicit statue - and the respect of his fellow man-whores. He shares a passionate kiss with Eva, and accidentally sets off the bomb when the statue's penis bumps the detonator button. Deuce and Eva then promptly leave the scene. The following day, Deuce and Eva come to pick up T.J., who has been released from jail, and tells them that he is entering a brand new prostitution market: gay man-whoring. Deuce then offers to treat Eva and T.J. to some food at the Chicken & Waffle restaurant. They all walk off as the screen fades black.

Cast

• Deuce Bigalow - Rob Schneider
• T.J. Hicks - Eddie Griffin
• Eva - Hanna Verboom
• Gaspar Voorsboch - Jeroen Krabbé
• Chadsworth Buckingham, III - Douglas Sills
• Assapopoulos Mariolis - Kostas Sommer
• Svetlana - Miranda Raison
• Louisa, the Dirty Girl - Rachel Stevens
• Heinz Hummer - Til Schweiger
• Antoine Laconte - Oded Fehr
• Kate Bigalow - Arija Bareikis
• Lily - Zoe Telford
• Greta, the Hunchback Girl - Dana Goodman
• Marlene Alsmere - Skytriss
• The Big-Eared Girl - Julia Lea Wolov

Critics and revenues

Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr. Schneider, your movie sucks.

Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times,

Roger Ebert gave this film a very rare "zero star" rating, ranking it as the worst film of 2005. He also chastised Rob Schneider for his overly-zealous defence of the series, referring to an incident in which a Los Angeles Times critic called Schneider a "third-rate comic"; Schneider responded by calling the Times critic a "third-rate, unfunny pompous reporter" in a full-page open letter published in Daily Variety and the Hollywood Reporter. Ebert includes this movie in his most hated films list. On the television show Ebert & Roeper, Richard Roeper called the film "the cinematic equivalent of a bunch of 13 year old boys in a locker room repeating dirty phrases they've just learned."

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo became the lowest earning picture of 2005 for films opening at over 3,000 theatres, making only 22.4 million dollars.

External links

• Official site
• Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo at IMDb
• Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo at Rotten Tomatoes